Women more likely to make friends if in 10-metre radius of public loo

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New research has uncovered a correlation between positive female social patterns and proximity to a public lavatory.

While the smell can be off-putting, women are far more likely to bond and natter in a bathroom than in any other public space. Scientists have attributed this phenomenon to a combination of awkward accidental eye contact while washing hands and safeguarding against being caught without a tampon.

Linda Payne, 30, from Southampton confessed: “I met my maid of honour in a toilet queue at Starbucks. We bonded over a mutual hatred of a man who was able to walk in to the gents without a wait. I’ve never known a friendship like it.”

The news also came as no surprise to Ella Stokes, 27, from Kent, whose friendship group consists exclusively of girls she met in local club toilets.

“‘I’m way more friendly to girls in club toilets,” explained Ella. “We say nice things to each other and validate each others’ existence. I don’t know if the bottle of rosé and three tequila shots I typically consume on a night out have anything to do with it.”

Science has yet to address the possible the correlation between alcohol abuse and the likelihood of a woman in a club loo exclaiming “oh my God, I’m obsessed with your crop top!”

Hannah Radley

Hannah is a writer, stand up comedian and improviser, which are just some of the techniques she uses to procrastinate from working on her history degree.