Boss who wants you to “relax and switch off” on holiday also wants you to “take a quick look at one thing”

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An Essex boss who wants you to “chill out and enjoy your holiday” is also planning to send you a few tiny bits that should only take you a couple of minutes to look at if you have time, no pressure.

“You really need to take some real time off work, otherwise you’ll burn out,” warned boss Alan Miller, 45. “A rested worker is a happy worker. Also, if it’s not too late in Crete, could you have a quick look at this marketing plan and tell me what you think?”

“I hope you’re not sneaking a look at your work emails while you’re out there,” chortled Alan. “That’s why I’ve texted you on your personal mobile number.”

“Thanks so much for your prompt reply, very naughty, you’re supposed to be forgetting all about work. But while I’ve got you, could you also work your magic on a couple of press releases? They can totally wait until you’re back on Sunday, of course, but the deadline is Friday…”

Alan wishes you a really lovely holiday and can’t wait to hear all about the things you didn’t see and do while you were holed up in your hotel room having an otherwise entirely normal working week.

Sara Gibbs

Sara is editor-in-chief of Succubus. Sara studied Writing & Producing Comedy at the NFTS and has written for The Now Show, Dead Ringers, The News Quiz, The Daily Mash and The Mash Report. Sara makes it her business to be at least five years behind the latest trends, so she can devote more time to her Tamagotchi.