Unfair! Natalie disappointed to learn boss will actually be returning from maternity leave

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An ambitious business development assistant from Exeter has spent the morning in a deep sulk after learning her boss will actually be returning from maternity leave, despite enduring years of entrenched societal pressure to do the exact opposite.

“She always said she’d come back after the nine months, but I didn’t think she actually would,” said Natalie Silver, 27, who has had her eye on a promotion since figuring out the not-so-clandestine office vomiter wasn’t bulimic, but up the duff instead.

“I was a shoe-in for the manager role if she didn’t come back,” complained Natalie. “To be honest, I think it’s a bit selfish of her – you can’t have kids and a career; it’s not fair.”

Natalie’s colleague Alex Bingham, 34, also shared his concerns.

“She’s probably going to be all hormonal and stuff, isn’t she?” He said, attracting seething looks from several women in the vicinity. “It’ll be like Carly all over again – she came back, cried when she couldn’t pop out for some appointment and quit within the year.”

However, new mum Hayley Dunn, 31, was quick to dispel any suggestions that she’d throw in the towel.

“If I can put up with my mother-in-law’s complaints about me going back to work, I can put up with a salesperson who thinks she’s the next VP and an idiot in accounts,” said Hayley.

“I’ve already spoken with the board and they might even let me express milk in the boardroom, if nobody’s using it, of course.”

Nicola Middlemiss

Nicola is a journalist in Sydney and usually writes about business and employment for a living. Originally from the North East of England, everyone always assumes she’s Scottish and nobody can quite believe how pale she is.