Lifestyle

Awkward! This woman tried to say goodbye and she choked, then tried to walk away and she stumbled

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When I saw you today, three things popped into my head: games, changes and fears. I don’t know why it was those three words, but I couldn’t help but wonder, where will they go from here? When will they cease to exist? I concluded that fate brought us here because we should we together, babe.

But we’re not.

I’m acting pretty blasé about it, but you’ve been on my mind non-stop. I’ve been playing it super casual, but when I close my eyes and go to bed, you’re constantly in my subconscious.

Then, it happened. I tried to say goodbye, but as I said it, I suddenly had intense difficulty breathing. Then I tried to turn around, and leave the situation, but I tripped! Whilst I tried to masquerade my blunder, it was intensely obvious that my Earth collapses inside on itself when we’re not together.

I know I look super cool and casual, but I’m absolutely trapped because I love you so much. I know I seem fine, but I’m literally just putting it on.

I’m not letting my constant thoughts about you get to me. I’m chill, but unfortunately when I close my eyes I can’t help but indulge in a series of fantasies involving you.

I tried to bid you farewell and I struggled for air, I put one foot in front of the other and then I stacked it – how embarrassing! Whilst I tried to present myself like everything is okay, it is pretty clear that myself as a planet is struggling without your presence.

Here’s something I need to say: I want to be owned by you. I’d like to be felt by you – hugs, mouth stuff, etc. You name it. I can’t lie about this anymore.

I tone it down but I’ve had a series of pleasant thoughts about you, inside my dreams. I know I’m distant but I’m craving you.

I tried to part ways from you, but I had trouble on my intake of breath. I tried to stride specifically not towards you, but I lost my footing – and hiding it’s impossible when my life forms a black hole when I’m not next to you.

Kat Sadler

Kat is a comedian, writer and mentally unwell bisexual. She's written for a whole bunch of stuff like Frankie Boyle's New World Order, The Mash Report, The News Quiz, The Daily Mash and other stuff, leave me alone mum, this is a real job. Check out her sad little blog here