Lifestyle

Five song recommendations to ignore because if you ever stop listening to your favourite song on repeat you’ll have a breakdown

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Sometimes to get through the day, all you can do is listen to the same song every single waking minute or you’ll lose your mind. Here are five of our favourite songs of the moment that you won’t listen to:

Go to town – Doja Cat

This is a really cool song by an artist we think you’ll love. But we know you’ll never even add it to your Spotify playlist because if you don’t listen to Toxic by Britney Spears on your walk to work, you’ll freak out and kick over one of the bikes chained to the railings outside your house.

Literally anything by Lizzo

Lizzo is basically an icon, but we know you won’t even Google her because frankly, your tolerance for anything other than the sweet familiarity of Britney means you’ll probably start crying if you even attempt to listen to something empowering at a time like this. But seriously, are you alright? Is everything okay at home?

Beach Bunny – Prom Queen

This song is perfect if you love surfy sad girl vibes, but we’re already sending our apologies to Beach Bunny, because the saddest girl is we know is you when you haven’t had your 100-times-daily dose of Britney Spears’s Toxic. And whilst we’re on the subject, we’re starting to feel like you’re self-medicating with a song, and it’s probably not the best coping strategy?

Janelle Monae – The whole of Dirty Computer

Yeah, I mean, we’re kidding ourselves to think you’ve got time to listen to a whole album, but hey, here goes nothing. If you’ve got time to read this article, you’ve got time to enjoy the incredible, innovative sounds of Monae- oh wait, you’re back on Toxic again. Almost had you that time. Erm anyway, so we’ve got some numbers for a local counselling service if you need help… I know we haven’t always been close but-  we’re here for you.

Deceptacon – Le Tigre

An awesome, badass song for when you wanna feel like you’re killing it on the regular. But no, you’ve gone back to your playlist. It’s not a playlist if it’s just got one song on it. Listen, we are genuinely worried about you: you know this isn’t normal right? Sometimes talking about your problems is the best thing to do rather than just bottling them up and relying on a single song to make you feel better every day. Loads of us go through stressful periods in our lives, and really, you’re not alone if you’re struggling. We struggle every day too!

Actually, damn, I really want to listen to Britney. Toxic is an absolute banger, isn’t it? It’s like a big hug for your ears. Go on, have a listen. We’re sorry we ever distracted you.

Written by Zoe Tomalin + Kat Sadler

Succubus Magazine

This article was a collaboration between two or more of our in-house writers.