Lifestyle

Three easy two-minute workouts you still won’t fit into your day

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It can be hard to find time to exercise. Here are some super-short workouts you still won’t find time for.

HIIT – High intensity interval training

Are you ready to push yourself to the point of hyperventilation, and then just as you feel your life force return, push yourself to the point of black out? By simply running, jumping or cycling at high intensity for 20 seconds at intervals over a two minute period, you will burn calories while hardly burning any time! Unfortunately for you, although this may take two minutes, the full shower, outfit change, and lie down you’ll need afterwards mean that you will never fit this into your day. Not to mention the time you’ll need to find afterwards to tell people about all the exercise you just did.

Stretching

Stretching relieves tension and improves posture, lengthening your limbs and basically turning you into a gazelle. You can stretch at your desk, while you’re waiting for the kettle to boil, while you’re watching TV, while you’re waiting for your most tedious friend to finish one of her stories – what could stop you fitting this into your day? Many things, it will transpire. Firstly, you look weird when you do it so it’s best done in solitude and darkness. But mainly, it will simply never occur to you to stretch when you could be doing something more important in a moment of downtime, like drinking or eating or scratching. 

The Plank

A fail-safe full-body exercise that both tones your bod and raises your heart rate, the plank is a friend to the time-poor. All you need to do is hold the position for two minutes and you will boost your metabolism and tighten your abs – hard to imagine how you could not fit this one in, but there’s always a way! The main issue is, this exercise requires floor space…well you don’t live in a palace! And, no, you’re never going to find the time to clear up all the things that are taking up the floor space you do have.

The truth is, you don’t only need time to fit in the briefest of exercise, you also need to want to exercise, which is why you will never ever fit even the shortest of work-outs into your day. You don’t go, girl!

Croft and Pearce

Hannah Croft & Fiona Pearce are two halves of the comedy-duo-that-sounds-like-a-lawfirm: Croft & Pearce. They regularly tour the UK with their live shows, as well as writing for radio (including their eponymous Radio 4 show) and for TV shows including The Tracey Ullman Show and The Mash Report.