Love & sex

Hero! Man still manages to objectify women in winter clothing

By  | 

A south London account manager has been high fived and called a “legend” after proving that it isn’t impossible to catcall women who are wrapped up from the cold weather.

“Myself and a few of the boys were out on lunch, and wandered through the park to get some great Instagram story material, when I spotted an absolute stunner walking her French Bulldog,” recalled  Tom Grant, 25. “I couldn’t really see much of her in her large parka, thick scarf, bobble hat and big walking boots, and she was bent down picking up her dog’s mess, but I just knew I couldn’t let the moment pass.”

“I mean, with what she was wearing, she obviously wanted someone to think about the sexy challenge of undressing her.”

After grabbing her attention with a snowball aimed her way, Tom proceeded to impress the woman further with his invitation to join them, and perhaps “warm up again with him afterwards.”

Although clearly an effort, she resisted enough to walk on without acknowledging him or his friends further at all.

“Better luck next time, eh?” Tom continued. “The lads and I are going out for a sesh and ski in Chamonix next month. I can’t wait to get out onto the slopes and find some women whose goggles won’t let their eyes bore into my soul and see how insecure and fragile I really am. Great times!”

Lucy Roper

Lucy works full time for the BBC (any views expressed here are her own, unless you really dislike them) and is a part-time stand-up. She made it to the final of the Laughing Horse New Act Of The Year 2015, and has been largely unsuccessful since.